Writing is Really Difficult
Over the last few days I've been pondering the ups and downs of the last year. I had a lot of big "life changes" and I was forced to choose carefully how I spent my time. I no longer had the luxury of long hours to read and write and review books.
For me, if I'm not reading and reviewing, it makes my writing motor run out of gas. I'm inspired when I read a great story and it makes me want to write a great story. But when time is limited, my reading suffers, and that directly affects my writing.
I knew that writing was tough, but I always felt like it came naturally to me. I never sit and stare at the blank screen because the words just aren't coming. I've never experienced that. What's truly tough is making time, finding time, or stealing time to write KNOWING THAT IT'S POSSIBLE THAT NO ONE WILL EVER READ WHAT YOU WROTE.
That's the difficult part for me. It's not the actual writing, it's taking all that time to create a story that I want to share with others, and then facing the fact that statistics tell me that what I'm aiming for is highly unlikely.
That's the hard part about writing.
Writing because you love writing is easy. There's no fail/succeed in that.
Writing because you love writing and want to be a published author is not easy. You either fail or succeed.
To spend so much time writing with the goal of being published, and knowing that a lot of people have that same goal their entire lives and never succeed, adds a deeper level of commitment to writing.
So I've come to a conclusion: I'm going to keep writing. :)
I'm not going to lie to myself and say that I don't care if I get published or not. I do. That's my goal. I'm can't change my goal because I found out it's a lot harder than I originally thought. I accept the fact that I may spend thousands of hours working toward something that may never happen.
Because in the end, we find out that the discipline of writing is more like a wise teacher than a fun thing we do. Our lives become richer, deeper, and fuller. We pull things out of our souls. Things like determination and perseverance and discipline.
And that is the reward.
For me, if I'm not reading and reviewing, it makes my writing motor run out of gas. I'm inspired when I read a great story and it makes me want to write a great story. But when time is limited, my reading suffers, and that directly affects my writing.
I knew that writing was tough, but I always felt like it came naturally to me. I never sit and stare at the blank screen because the words just aren't coming. I've never experienced that. What's truly tough is making time, finding time, or stealing time to write KNOWING THAT IT'S POSSIBLE THAT NO ONE WILL EVER READ WHAT YOU WROTE.
That's the difficult part for me. It's not the actual writing, it's taking all that time to create a story that I want to share with others, and then facing the fact that statistics tell me that what I'm aiming for is highly unlikely.
That's the hard part about writing.
Writing because you love writing is easy. There's no fail/succeed in that.
Writing because you love writing and want to be a published author is not easy. You either fail or succeed.
To spend so much time writing with the goal of being published, and knowing that a lot of people have that same goal their entire lives and never succeed, adds a deeper level of commitment to writing.
So I've come to a conclusion: I'm going to keep writing. :)
I'm not going to lie to myself and say that I don't care if I get published or not. I do. That's my goal. I'm can't change my goal because I found out it's a lot harder than I originally thought. I accept the fact that I may spend thousands of hours working toward something that may never happen.
Because in the end, we find out that the discipline of writing is more like a wise teacher than a fun thing we do. Our lives become richer, deeper, and fuller. We pull things out of our souls. Things like determination and perseverance and discipline.
And that is the reward.
2 comments
I'm with you, Aaron - this year has been full of life-changing challenges, but we're still here, still motivated, and we'll get there! I've never found the writing part easy, but I do love it when it flows. What a natural high! And those are always the best passages when one comes back to edit later. You will get there, if you don't pull out of the race early. The only way to the finish line is forward. I'm cheering you on.
I can easily, and do often, become stuck when I know that my writing will most likely just be read by me (and maybe my boyfriend.) I have been keeping a tab open with the Youtube video of a choral piece I wrote the lyrics for...and every time I wallow, I can play the video and feel that amazing sense of accomplishment and pride. People have heard my words! I wish it was always like that. Good luck with your process.
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